The Screwtape Letters- Letters VIII and IX

I can relate to both of these letters. In Letter VIII, Screwtape advises his nephew to take advantage of the dull times of human life. In these times idle thoughts can be a detriment to one's faith. The "black and white" lines swirl into a dark gray. Good things that God has given us to enjoy- sex, alcohol, and relationships are gradually perverted. Any satisfaction found in them is lost with this perversion. It seems like we're longing for the meaning and fulfillment that comes through God alone, but we deny that it comes from God. We try to find it in the mere actions without the spiritual aspect of them. . .
I really enjoyed Letter IX. "He wants them to learn to walk and must therefore take away His hand; and if only the will to walk is really there He is pleased even with their stumbles." This is one thing I've been gradually learning. I also look forward to the "mountain-top" experiences with God. I long for those moments when I have no doubts, when I know I'm exactly where God wants me to be. But, most of life is the "everyday."And somehow, God loves me in the everyday, he shows himself in a million small ways each day that I easily overlook. It's also amazing to me that God loves me even when I stumble. Often times in my faith I get to doing things on my own. I forget that Jesus died for me- on nothing I have done. When I stumble in my faith and doubt him I feel like I have failed- but thats the point. I can't do it on my own. Thats WHY Jesus died.